My complicated first love

          she is cute mann,I said to myself ,I don't know why I fell to her may be her smile i think... was that smile that cute?
ya her name was shravani all i knew about her was only this much her name and her cute smile,then i started to study about her background,then i came to know she comes from a village near by my place called indavara, she comes daily to college through bus,couldn't find out about her parents

      this cute smile girl shravani had already made me sleepless for almost a week,i couldn't resist this day she was standing in our college canteen holding a cadbury dairymilk chocolate with her silver nail polished fingers with the cute smile on her face again ,she was talking to her friends,I said to myself enough is enough and went directly to her she was confused

       I said her "....I think.......... i am in.....love with u"  i dont know where i had this courage inside me i did it
i cant belive but still i had proposed her,i felt like her cadbury started melting she didnt speak a word she stood like a statue with a cute smile bit confused statue,then again i couldnt control my tonque i asked her"i really find u interesting can we hang around..........." that smiling statue didnt open her lips again she looked at me from top to bottom like a lifeless tree, paid for her chocolate and left the canteen, all other students kept looking at me.... as if i had murdered someone that moment was really worst, felt like i was sitting on a hot stove
         but surprisingly it had worked,i was in a sad mood because of the incident happened yesterday drinking coke,even that coke was tasting bitter,but this day she came to me i stood from my chair i thought i would get the marks of her slippers on my cheeks....but no she came to me gave me a dairymilk chocolate with a small chit with it, is this yes i asked her she smiled and disappeared i opened the chit it was written with beautiful handwriting "With Love shravani" what was with love is it the chocolate or the more sweeter smile on her face
suddenly i realised even she is in love with me, i ate that chocolate alone though my friends started teasing me
i didnt give even a single bite of that chocolate to any one,this is how it all started i was very happy even god realised it i guess the clouds disappeared and the bright morning sun came out,i cant forget that day most happiest day of my life
   soon afterfew days,we were damn close, we went to movies together all romantic movies not even a single horror,i can name few for u jane tu ya jane na,jab we met and some more flop romantic movies also which i dont remember,she had given me a lot of gifts these one month since we got commited, novels like five point someone,three mistakes of my life,a jacket and my favorite a 8000rs tommy watch ,even i had given her many gifts one of the costliest is16000rs gucci bag,i dont remember how many celebrations chocolates we both ate together,like this life was cool,happiness every where,that evening i remember she didnt give me chocolates or any other stuff she spoke to me about the past few beautiful days our life our eyes became wet she was crying i thought it was too much of love ...she kissed me on my cheeks and went home
           
 the date was 11/7/2008 on the news paper,Minister ranganarayana  killed by naxalites
a 20 year girl named shravani killed herself to kill the minister with a suicide bomb with her parents ramaraj(52) and jailakshmi(46) they even killed the two police gaurds and a sub inspector as of this incident colleges,schools and offices will be remained closed today i was shocked because they had put my smiling face shravanis photo with it tears came out of my eyes,i went to her village and enquired her house was locked and police surrounding it for investigation
            still i wonder "was i in love with a naxalite????? "the question remains forever in my heart

                                                                                                                    -nes